SPAIN TO WITHDRAW TROOPS FROM IRAQ

New Spanish Prime Minister, Jose Luis Rodriguez Zapatero (crazy name, crazy guy) has threatened to withdraw the Spanish complement of 1,300 troops from Iraq unless the U.N. takes over from the U.S..

Leaving aside for a moment the question of how having the U.N. in charge would be any better than having the U.S. in charge, the threat has raised eyebrows amongst world leaders, most of whom were blissfully unaware that Spain had any troops in Iraq to start with.

Colin Powell and the Joint Chiefs of the Armed Forces have drafted in a local geography teacher to point out Spain to them on the map (once they had located it, Colin Powell was overheard muttering "so where the hell is France then?").

Meanwhile on the ground in Iraq U.S. forces are relieved that they have can now positively identify the soldiers who have spent the last 6 months by the pool, except for the middle of the afternoon when they all disappeared for 3 to 4 hours. The U.S. army had been worried they may be remnants of Husseins elite army units, but they had seemed very confident they were supposed to be there, and hadn't hurt anyone, and after a few weeks had passed it would have been rude to simply go up and ask who the hell they were.