IRAQ CRISIS

2 more countries have announced they will be withdrawing their troops from Iraq. Spain has already said it is withdrawing 1,400 troops, now Honduras is withdrawing 368 and the Dominican Republic 302. Meanwhile Thailand (450) have threatened to withdraw their troops should they be attacked.

This is presenting huge problems for Bush and the American administration. Despite the concerted efforts of the CIA, FBI and Homeland Security Office, they have been unable to find any imported products made by any of these countries which they can use to whip up a bit of jingoistic patriotism by either boycotting or renaming "Freedom (insert product here)". In fact there is some debate at senior levels as to whether Honduras and the Dominican Republic actually produce anything at all. Calls to all 3 countries have not clarfified the situation as they are always answered by a machine informing the caller that the it is siesta time, and to please call back later.