DENTISTS

Just back from 2 hours lying in a dentist chair while some sadistic maniac armed with a drill and a syringe caused havoc in my mouth.

Top tip for trips to the dentists - take your iPod, preferably with lots of AC/DC and The Pogues on it. Make sure it's fully charged, and the settings allow you to turn up the volume till your ears bleed and the dentist is asking you to turn it down.

And following todays fun, here are a few things you don't want to hear at a dentists...

Sharp intake of breath followed by (to assistant) "Could you please ask Mrs X (presumably on reception) to call my next patient and cancel. And order some sandwiches too please."

"When do you have to be back at the office?"

"Will you have to talk much this afternoon at work?"

"Are you allergic to any painkillers?"

"I think we've got it fixed, but there's a chance...."

and finally, just as you are leaving,

"Do you have any Advil or Nurofen at the office?"

This could be a loooooong afternoon

And I have to go back for more next week.


UPDATE

4PM - the anaesthetic has now worn off, thought thankfully the Nurofen is doing a grand job of holding back the worst of the pain.

BUT - he has made the new fillings too big - I can;t properly close my teeth. Got to go back at 6 for more drilling and grinding. Fcuking great.

Mrs C - please make sure we have all the ingredients required for a HUGE gin and tonic when i get home.