THIS IS TOO SICK TO HAVE AN AMUSING TITLE.

11:13 19Jul2004 RTRS-Drunk Filipino nails wife's mouth shut, kills her
    MANILA, July 19 (Reuters) - A drunken Filipino farmer nailed his wife's mouth shut and beat her to death in front of their children, then prepared breakfast for her the next day without realising he had killed her, police said on Monday.
    Police called to the house of Rodolfo and Vilma Porras in the town of Manapla, in the central Philippines, on Saturday found the 40-year-old woman dead in her bed with one-inch (two cm) nails driven through her mouth and the back of both knees.
    Police officer Eliseo Solaban said two of the couple's four children, a girl aged 10 and a boy of eight, told investigators their father beat their mother to death with an iron and drenched her with boiling water after coming home drunk.
    The girl was still in shock, Solaban said by telephone.
    Porras, 40, was on the run on Monday. The man awoke on the morning after Friday's killing and cooked breakfast as normal, then fled after realising his wife was dead, the policeman said.
    "I've worked on shocking crimes before, but I can't hide how I feel about a man doing this to his wife," Solaban said.